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We are Men of Action, Meetings do not Become Us.

The Princess Bride

The other day I found myself in a meeting regarding a CRM package we are implementing. The implementation company had brought two project managers, a sales lady, and a geek who will actually assist in the implementation. I sat in on this meeting with some of our executives and sales people.

I was regaled with your typical clichés and buzzwords including:

  • Deliverables
  • Success Factors
  • Action Items
  • Methodologies
  • Thinking outside the box.

The project manager who has PMP certification reads through slide after PowerPoint slide. Each slide includes numerous bullet points each having the same cheesy metal hitting sound effect. Their sales people are really bonding with our sales people because both groups live for this stuff.

At one point I literally laughed out loud because the PMP was listing possible risk factors to project success and he actually listed “Acts of God.” He then proceeded to explain to us what “Acts of God” were such as earthquakes, hurricanes, etc. As if there was a devastating earthquake, we wouldn’t expect the project to be delayed.

To be clear, I am not suggesting that the meeting wasn’t necessary. I’m just suggesting that the meeting should have been condensed into less than 10 minutes.

Anyway well into the second hour, I am barely clinging to consciousness. In an effort to stay awake, I look around the room and my eyes lock with those of their geek. The eyes are the windows of the soul… I could tell right then that I had a kindred spirit; the only other person in the room who recognized as a colossal waste of time. For some reason, my mind went back to the scene in The Princess Bride where Count Rugen takes Westley prisoner.

I just wish I could have messaged him, “We are men of action, meetings do not become us.”

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