I Can Ride a Bike. Yay!!! That’s Great!

Special Ed

Special Ed from Crank Yankers

I’ve received a few e-mails asking where I’ve been lately. I got a killer virus and I finally had to wipe my primary machine and install all the necessary software. However, that’s not the primary reason I have been silent as of late.

Some of you know I’ve been riding my butt off lately. I joined a recreational team because I work and train with two of the members. Anyway, my coworker came to me and said that the leader would like to use my joining the team to get free stuff from sponsors like drink mix, gels you eat while riding, etc. I wasn’t really paying attention so I told her to do whatever she wanted; I am certainly willing to take free stuff. I later found out that I need to document my mileage to submit for this program. You see, they have me signed up as a “special needs” rider because of my weight. Yes folks, I am the bicycling equivalent of a Special Olympian. It doesn’t matter that I put more miles on the bike than any of them, this is how I’m labeled. So, when we go to rest stops, I act mentally challenged, say Durh! a lot, and miss my mouth with the water on purpose. What the heck, it gets laughs.

I decided that I needed some real bicycling jerseys to use on these group rides, so I didn’t look like a compete goober. However, they are difficult to find in my size because most serious bicyclists weigh 150 lbs. So, I ordered several jerseys along with a bunch of expensive bicycling equipment online and they arrived yesterday. None of the jerseys are sized consistently and the only one that remotely fit was bright red and at least a size too small. So, my team kept saying all day, “Hey Koolaid!!!”. Of course, in response I had to say, “Oh Yeah!!!” with a ridiculously low voice.

Kool Aid Man

Oh Yeah!!!

Anyway, I finished my first group ride in 3 years last week. We made it through 47 miles and I did pretty well. My muscles cramped a bit here and there, but the worst thing that happened was sunburn. In fact, I got up at 6am the next morning to take a 10 mile recovery ride on the bike. My weight is coming down and my stamina is going up. I can do anything.

Oh, and if you’re wondering if I still intend to do the Hotter Than Hell Century ride at the end of the summer the answer is…

Oh Yeah!!!!

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